#look at these two dorks #just two study buddies #casually flirting #and making heart eyes at each other #seriously just get a room already
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“It’s difficult to explain to your brother that you broke up with the love of your life and then broke the bed”
— Damon
Prompt List of Sarcasm
- “Well, what can I say? I’m a badass.”
- “Define normal.”
- “Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?”
- “Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English.”
- “Don’t look for any redeeming qualities. I don’t have any.”
- “It’s amazing how fast the world can go from bad to total shit storm.”
- “I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.”
- “And you wonder why you’re still single.”
- “Remind me to kill you. Please.”
- “I’m listening to you. I’m just not paying attention.”
- “That’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think?”
- “Were you dropped on your head?”
- “She’s crazy. And just when you think you’ve reached the bottom of her craziness, there’s a crazy underground garage.”
- “She may seem like lollipops and rainbows but I bet behind close doors she’s latex and whips.”
- “If my day gets any worse, I’m asking hell if they’re having an exchange program.”
- “Sorry. I don’t speak skank.”
- “If I survive, can I go home?”
- “My middle finger salutes you.”
- “This is a whole new level of moronic, even for you.”
- “I don’t think I could ever stab someone. I mean, let’s be honest. I can barely get the straw in the Capri Sun.”
- “I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.”
- “Insanity run in my family. It practically gallops.”
- “Oh darling. Go buy a brain.”
- “Somebody’s cranky.” “Somebody needs to shut up.”
- “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.”
- “All due respect, but that’s a bunch of crap.”
- “I am one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence behind.”
- “Excuse me. I have to go make a scene.”
- “What did I tell you about calling her/him the devil?” “That it’s offensive to the devil?”
- “I heard that!” “You were supposed to!”
- “I need therapy after this.”
- “You didn’t get in trouble for lying. You got in trouble for lying badly.”
- “I’m not weird. I am limited edition.”
- “I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned.”
- “I think you’re weird.” “I think you’re boring.”
- “If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur.”
- “You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?”
- “I’m afraid I’ve been thinking…” “A dangerous pastime.”
- “I’d explain it to you, but you’re brain would explode.”
- “Wow, there’s a big surprise. I think I’m going to have a heart attack and die from surprise.”
- “I’m gonna hit you so hard, it’ll make you ancestors dizzy.”
- “Even when we were kids, I always kicked your ass!”
- “Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity.”
- “You’re good. A monster pain in the ass… but you’re good.”
- “Well, excuse me, psychic wonder!”
- “The female of the species is more deadly than the male.”
- “Don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.”
- “She’s hot, but she’s evil.”
- “Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.”
- “I already know that I’m going to hell. At this point it’s really go big or go home.”
- “Go on, knock his teeth down his throat.”
- “You’re going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters, animal abusers and people who talk at the theater.”
- “What’s the point in screaming? No one’s listening anyway.”
- “I’m not a damsel in distress. I’m a damsel doing damage.”
- “So stick that in your juice box and suck it.”
- “Never take life seriously. No one ever comes out alive anyway.”
- “This place hold a lot of memories for me. Some bad, some… No. No, no, all bad.”
- “A little gasoline… blowtorch… no problem.”
- “Good, bad, I’m the one with the gun.”
- “I know you can’t kill anybody, ‘cause I can’t kill anybody.”
- “You’re insane, but you might also be brilliant.”
- “What you call insanity, I call inspiration.”
- “Sometimes I question my sanity. Occasionally it replies.”
- “Why should we date?” “Because we are attracted to each other.” “I am attracted to pie, but I do not feel the need to date pie.”
- “Why does everyone assume the worst of me.” “It saves time.”
- “I like you. You’re different.”
- “You successfully cured him/her of anything interesting about his/her personality.”
- “Neither one us is drunk enough for this conversation.”
- “You’re questioning my methods.” “I’m not questioning it, I’m saying it’s stupid.”
- “Wow, somebody needs a Happy Meal.”
- “I didn’t do it!” “Then why are you laughing?” “Because whoever did it is a freaking genius.”
- “Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots.”
- “You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.”
- “I care so little, I almost passed out.”
- “Well behaved woman rarely make history.”
- “You’re so weird.” “You have no idea.”
- “The universe may not always play fair, but at least it’s got a hell of a sense of humor.”
- “You haven’t even seen my bad side yet.”
- “Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.”
- “How’s life treating you?” “Like I ran over it’s dog.”
- “Rule number one: don’t bother sucking up. I already hate you, that’s not going to change.”
- “Oh God, we’re not gonna have to hug or anything, are we.”
- “I’m so glad you could come.” “Cut the crap. Give me a drink.”
- “You make no sense to me.” “Welcome to my life.”
- “Have fun being deal.” “I will.”
- “Damn, you’re strong for a little thing.”
- “It’s called thinking. Go with it.”
- “I made a new friend today.” “Real or imaginary?” “Imaginary.”
- “Where have you been all my life?” “Hiding from you.”
- “I’m getting real bored and impatient. I don’t do bored and impatient.”
- “The girl is strange no question.”
- “Do us a favor… I know it’s difficult for you… but please, stay here, and try no to do anything… stupid.”
- “I know most people don’t like me; I don’t care, I don’t like most people.”
- “You are a very strange person.” “Well, thanks for noticing.”
- “I can tell that you think what you’re saying is funny, but… no.”
- “I didn’t steal it. I permanently borrowed it.”
- “I’m not shy. I’m just examining my prey.”
- “If you pull out my earphones, I will pull out your lungs.”
- “I don’t dislike you, I nothing you.”
- “Are you crying? No, I’m impersonating a fountain.”
- “Ah, he’s playing hard-to-get. That’s cute.”
- “You’re kinda anti-social, you know that?”
- “I feel like a freakin’ soccer mom.”
- “My advice is much more subtle. Stop being an ass.”
- “I’m just gonna pack up and go straight to hell now.”
- “My ex? Yeah, I’d still hit that. Except this time it would be with a car or baseball bat.”
- “She’s complicated like the DaVinci code, you know but harder to crack.”
- “And just like everything else we do around here, it’s about to get weirder.”
- “Such big evil in such a little thing.”
- “Why do I still like you, knowing you’re a total asshole?”
- “What does not kill you will likely try again.”
- “Oh honey, I would but… I don’t want to.”
- “And hello to you too… little homewrecker.”
- “I’m gonna make you wish you were dead.”
- “I don’t need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.”
- “What doesn’t kill me might make me kill you.”
- “In another life, I think I was in a mental institution.”
- “I’m not crazy. I’m just interesting.”
- “Don’t make me pop your ten grand sand bags honey.”
- “This is fun.” “Seriously, we’re trying to hide a body.”
No More Waiting
sterolinedits asked: Ugghh can you make a smut kind of steroline fic, at the cabin. Caroline is breaking and can’t resist Stefan anymore.
I’m so sorry that this took me forever to get out, but I hope you like it either way. The smut is pretty lengthy so maybe that will make up for the wait?
It was that Henley he wore, it had to have been.
Or maybe his cologne, she never really could resist the way the woodsy smell seemed to wrap around her like a blanket.
But then again his smile away seemed to turn her to mush, along with his sharp jawline, and crystal green eyes.
Oh, and she couldn’t forget his personality. His kindness and selflessness, God was she a sucker for a man who could fix a car and cook, or what?
Maybe it was one of those reasons why she just couldn’t stop herself from grabbing Stefan’s neck and bring his lips down to hers.
It almost seemed pointless just to give up all of her progress now, and finally give into her temptations, but Caroline knew it wasn’t. After waiting for the past few months she realized that the pain of losing her mom wasn’t ever going to go away, she was just going to have to make room for it. No matter what amount of time she waited, whether it be years or decades, her heartache would follow her forever.
So, as soon as she saw Stefan’s face come through the front door she decided that she was done making herself and the brunette wait. She was going to finally allow herself to be truly happy. With Stefan. She was going to finish healing from her loss with Stefan by her side.
Nothing could have stopped Caroline from marching over to where her lover was standing, and doing the one act she was refraining from doing for so long.
As soon as their lips met Caroline felt as if she could finally breathe again. She felt her blood start to properly pump through her veins. And although her eyes were closed she felt like she was seeing the world a thousand times clearer. Just as clear as the first time she had kissed Stefan.
It was amazing, the thousands of emotions flowing through her. She relished in the love she had locked up finally being released into her heart and bloodstream.
And when Stefan’s tongue found her own that love turned to fire, molten lava spreading all the way down to her toes. Caroline couldn’t stop the moan she let out at the feeling.
Her hands quickly found there way into Stefan’s locks, fisting them gently, needing to ground herself to the Earth. Caroline was afraid she might float with how light and joyful she felt. The so many emotions that were tumbling around in her brain made the blonde dizzy, and her passionate kiss with Stefan left her breathless.
She pulled away for some much needed oxygen, resting her forehead against Stefan’s. Her hands slowly moved down to the lapels of his jacket, gripping them. She wanted to stay as close as she could to him right now, not willing to let go seconds after she finally got him.
Their eyes never left each other, and neither did the hands Stefan had on Caroline’s hips. The blonde could feel his breath tickling her face and she had to resist pulling his mouth to hers again.
“I’m done waiting, Stefan. I’m done making you wait. I want to be together, I want to be yours.” Caroline said bashfully, her fingers moving up to run through the hair at the nape of Stefan’s neck.
“I’ll have you as long as you have me.” The brunette murmured, not even able to comprehend that Caroline was ready to be with him. That she was finally his, and he was hers.
The joy that was rushing through him was unfathomable, and he felt the strong need the take Caroline into a bone crushing hug and kiss her until he could no more.
Caroline took a small breath, stepping closer to Stefan, her voice dropping to just above a whisper. “I love you.”
Stefan’s heart stopped beating after hearing her say that, he was sure of it. He was also sure that he loved her too, so much. He loved everything about her. He loved Caroline Forbes.
“I love you too.”
Caroline gave Stefan a teary smile at hearing that, before grabbing his cheeks and pulling him down to kiss her again. Right when their mouths met again the fireworks started, as did the little electric sparks that ran through out their bodies.
One of Stefan’s hands found it’s into Caroline’s hair, cradling that back of her head, and bring her even closer to him. Soon their tongues found each other once again, lapping and stroking gently, yet so passionately. Neither of the two even tried to restrain the sounds leaving them. The moans and whimpers hovering freely in the air of the cabin.
Caroline pulled away again, this time with a different intention. “Take me to bed, Stefan.”
Stefan nodded, pecking Caroline on the lips before grabbing her hand and leading her through the cabin that he was somewhat familiar with.
Finding his way quite easily, Stefan pulled Caroline into her old room. His arms found their way around her midsection again, as did his lips find hers.
They kissed one another languidly, hands removing clothing as they did so. There were no feelings of being rushed, or hurried. They both knew that they had all the time in the world to truly explore each other’s bodies. There was nothing else right now besides them, no worries, no interruptions. Just them.
Stefan and Caroline eventually found their way to the bed still clad in their undergarments. They locked eyes as the blonde was lowered gently onto her back, Stefan’s body being placed over her own.
His lips automatically found her neck, his teeth biting and nipping at the sensitive skin, his tongue soothing away the sting. Caroline moaned at the feeling, all the heat her body was generating going down to her core.
The brunette’s mouth began moving south, his lips sucking on the swells of Caroline’s breasts. Her back arched, encouraging him to continue as well as release the clasp of her bra.
When Caroline removed her bra completely, Stefan wasted no time before bringing a nipple into his mouth. He laved the peak, enjoying the little sounds that escaped Caroline every time his tongue circled the nub.
Caroline’s hands came up to burry into Stefan’s hair, pushing his face harder against her chest. She whimpered when she felt him bite down on her breast. Her body was writhing, as well as her hips grinding up towards Stefan’s erection. A shiver ran through her body at the groans she was eliciting from him, his voice sounding rough and gravelly.
Caroline hummed in anticipation when she noticed the hand that Stefan was dragging down her stomach, moaning loudly when the said hand dipped into her panties.
Stefan groaned when he felt how wet the blonde was, imagining what it would feel like to be inside of her silken heat.
His fingers began to run up and down Caroline’s slit, every once and awhile drawing circles on the bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs.
The way Stefan’s fingers were moving had Caroline gasping in pleasure, her body feeling like it was wound too tightly. “Stefan I need you. I need you to make love to me.”
“I will, for hours, but first I want to take care of you.” Stefan said sincerely, his lips grasping the blonde’s once more as he removed her panties. They both felt the love that was put into the kiss, for it flowed through their veins, pumping around their bodies.
Stefan’s fingers continued their exploration, two of them suddenly entering the woman under him.
Caroline moaned at the welcome intrusion, her legs instinctively wrapping around Stefan waist as his skillful fingers worked her in all of the right places. Her moaning was unwarranted, and she couldn’t control it if she tried, everything felt so magnified. So overwhelming. Stefan’s soft lips, and his warm, toned body. The hand that was buried deep inside her. Nothing had ever felt so divine, so exquisite. Her mind was racing with thoughts of love and adoration, a heavy cloud of lust making everything intense and hazy.
All of this was building inside of her, only adding to the warming and tightening in her womb. Every curl and twist of Stefan’s fingers was sending Caroline that much closer to the edge, and her hands grappled for something to hold on to.
All of her muscles were beginning to freeze, her heels digging into Stefan’s spine, all the while he pumped in and out of her pussy. Each push sending Caroline closer to nirvana.
The blonde’s eyes met with Stefan’s, both’s pupils dilated as far as they could go. Though Caroline felt she was being blinded by pleasure her gaze never left her lover’s even when a curl of Stefan’s fingers sent her flying over the edge with a cry of his name.
His fingers continued to move within her, wanting to draw out her orgasm for as long as possible. For she was a beautiful sight to see, with her face and neck flushed, her golden hair splayed around her head, and her pleasure filled expression. Stefan felt he could look at her for eternity.
His attention was drawn elsewhere when he felt Caroline begin to clench around his fingers again as another orgasm quickly built up. Her body shook beneath his as her mouth opened and closed with silent screams of ecstasy. Stefan sped up the pace of his fingers, starting to curl them against her g-spot again, while his thumb began to rub her sensitive clit.
Cries started to leave the blonde’s lips as she approached her second orgasm. The pleasure she was feeling was almost too much, and she desperately needed a release. “Please,” She whimpered, her nails clawing at Stefan’s back and shoulders.
“Come for me, Caroline.” That’s all the blonde needed for her orgasm to rip through her. Her back arched off the bed as her body convulsed, a high pitched moan resonating through the room.
As Caroline came down from her intense high, she took notice of the adoring smile Stefan was giving her, and she couldn’t help but return it.
“I love you.” Caroline’s breath caught as she heard Stefan’s say those words for the second time that day. Her heart was beating faster than ever before, and she was sure it was going to explode.
“And I love you.” The blonde returned, and Stefan leant down, kissing Caroline with all he had. The blonde returned the lip lock happily, her hands migrating from her lover’s shoulders to his hips where she began to push his boxers down. Stefan felt what she was doing and helped by kicking them off of his legs.
Stefan swallowed the gasp Caroline emitted when she felt his large erection press against her stomach. She barely waited a second before reaching between them and grasping his cock in her hand, stroking him.
Stefan let out a strangled groan as her nimble fingers enveloped his length, his hips involuntarily bucking forward. He longed to be inside her warmth. He longed for the familiar feeling of her around him. The first time they were together, he did not have the time to appreciate the moment. He was not able to bask in the intimacy that was shared between them. But now he could, for hours if he wanted to. He could make love to her for as long as he’d like.
Through his thoughts Stefan could feel Caroline bring him to her entrance, and the legs she had wrapped around him ease his waist forward, in encouragement. He took the opening he had to push inside her depths, moaning along with Caroline as she clenched around him.
“Move, please.” The blonde rasped out, her hips squirming under Stefan’s, trying to create any friction they could. He felt so amazing inside of her, so warm and hard. She felt so full, every sensitive spot within her was being attended to, and she lost control of the sounds that were escaping her mouth.
Stefan didn’t hesitate to begin moving after Caroline’s plead. The pace he set wasn’t fast or demanding, but rather passionate and slow. His every thrust had meaning, for he was showing Caroline how much he loved her. How much she meant to him.
The blonde kept Stefan’s gaze, even as the immense pleasure she was feeling gave her the instinct to close her eyes. She didn’t want to miss a second of her time with Stefan, she didn’t want to miss out on a second of looking into his green eyes. She couldn’t miss the emotion that was being held there, she wouldn’t.
As the pleasure they felt progressed, so did the speed of the brunette’s thrusts, feeding to the friction which their bodies craved. With backs arching and toes curling, calls of one another’s names flying over head, nothing else existed besides them at the moment. No thoughts of problems, or issues. Nothing but love.
Stefan began to feel his orgasm creeping up on him, and quickly adjusted the angle of his hips so his erection brushed against Caroline’s bundle of nerves with every movement. Her wanted to please his love before he even thought about doing the same to himself. Caroline always came first wether it be in trivial matters or important ones.
The blissful cry Caroline emitted was like music to Stefan’s ears, and by the tightening in the blonde’s core, he could tell she was close. Stefan’s movements became more powerful every time he felt Caroline’s body tremble. He knew she was about to orgasm, and after a rather hard thrust she did with a loud moan of Stefan’s name.
As her legs tightened and her core spasmed around him, Stefan felt that he could not hold on any longer. After a few final pushes of his hips, Stefan collapsed onto Caroline, careful not to hurt her. He placed a few lingering kisses on her neck and collarbone, before traveling up and capturing her lips. Caroline kissed him back languidly, her tongue slowly stroking his as they recovered from their highs.
Stefan broke from the kiss, gently rolling over and pulling Caroline on top of him, wrapping his arms around her. He couldn’t help the sigh of contentment that left him thinking of the moments the couple just shared. It was everything he could have hoped for, and he had faith in the fact that Caroline felt the same.
“Thank you, Stefan, for being patient with me.” Caroline whispered into Stefan’s neck, nuzzling the warm skin there with her nose.
The brunette reached a hand up to stroke her soft hair, brushing it away from her temple so he could place a small kiss in the area. “I would have waited as long as I had to, whether it be ten years or a hundred.”
Pushing herself up to look Stefan in the eyes, Caroline smiled, getting butterflies at the look of adoration that she was met with. “I know you would have, and I couldn’t be more grateful to have someone as perfect as you at my side.”
Thank you for teaching us so much. You and your character will be missed.❤️❤️

